A Vision Birthed in Silence
In 2004, on a prophetic prayer journey with Lou Engle, we prayed in front of Harriet Beecher Stowe’s house asking God to birth songs that would end abortion. I asked Jesus, “Give me songs to end abortion.” God answered that prayer quickly, as I stood in front of the Supreme Court a few months later with red tape over my mouth that said, “LIFE”. I heard a song from heaven that God was singing over the unborn, “Their voices will be heard in their silence.” I couldn’t sing the song I was hearing because the LIFE tape covered my mouth in silence. I ran back to the Justice House of Prayer and scratched out the lyrics that became the song, “Voiceless”.
In 2007, after my journey led me back to IHOP-KC, I began seriously considering a major CD Project, Mighty Warrior. The vision of the project is songs that will end abortion, impact the justice movement, and prepare the Bride of Christ for His return. I connected with the primary person responsible for CD production at IHOP-KC. After listening to my songs, we began moving forward recording scratch tracks and creating a budget. After seeing the budget, I definitely knew it was going to have to be a miracle!
Sometimes a Vision Must First Die to be Fulfilled
Two years went by. I was completely discouraged. Was it ever going to happen? It felt like the vision had died. At the end of that time, the producer realized that he was going to have to back out because of his intense traveling schedule. I had already raised thousands of dollars. What was I going to do? I was imagining writing a letter apologizing to my supporters confessing that I had missed God.
At the beginning of 2010, I began searching for another producer. I was encouraged to finally connect with another producer and began moving forward. However, when we made the budget, it was too much money for me. Discouraged, this time, I backed out and thought for sure it was all over.
A few months later, a supporter called me to tell me they were going to give me several thousand dollars. They said, “The Lord has called you to do this project.” I was encouraged and began to pray. I talked to a trusted leader on the Nightwatch and shared my journey with him. He suggested a mutual friend. I approached the person and it was a perfect fit. I began moving forward, securing a studio, and musicians. In December of 2010, after years of waiting and preparation, I released my first CD Project, Mighty Warrior. The project was way better then I could have ever planned or imagined.
Maybe you have a vision that God has given you. Don’t give up. Even as he gave me strength to wait, he will give you strength. Isaiah 40:30,31- “Even youths shall faint and be weary, and young men shall fall exhausted; but they who wait for the LORD shall they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.” Whatever He has put in your heart, it is worth waiting for. The Lord does not put any desire in us that He is not able to fulfill.
Your God Will Come- The Story Behind the Song
My sister, Kristen, sings with me on this song. Her daughter, Brianna, was diagnosed with diabetes when she was only three years old. Brianna’s life is very difficult to say the least. She is constantly dependent upon insulin and, even then, her blood sugar will either plummet low or be dangerously high. This song is dedicated to her and my friends who are still waiting for healing. Your God will come and we will fight in prayer in the night until He does.
The week of tracking vocals for this song, I suddenly came down with a cold and lost my voice. The night before we tracked this song, during the Nightwatch at IHOP-KC, God miraculously healed my voice.
Hold Me- The Story Behind the Song
In 2007, I went through a difficult season of life. A close friend and someone I labored with in prayer for many years committed suicide. In addition, I was having lots of difficultly in my friendships. I was in pain.
In the midst of that pain, Father came. He began to reach deep into the places of hurt and pain healing wounds from my childhood, the hurt that came from leaders, and so many other areas of brokenness. I read Deuteronomy 33:27- “The eternal God is your dwelling place, and underneath are the everlasting arms…” I began to see that in the midst of my pain, Father was holding me. He was not far away. He was actively working to heal my broken heart.
“Hold Me” has brought more healing to my own heart than any other song I’ve written. I pray that all who listen will find healing and be drawn into deep intimacy with Father.
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